January 1: Alerted by my tip, @MinneapolisMaps helps you find dirty dancing in the early hours of New Year’s Day.

January 2: We were all a few sheets to the wind that night.

January 9: No comment.

January 12: In this blog entry, I pointed out that dolphins sometimes have blowhole sex.

January 16: Katie and I went to the play Girls Only, which unsurprisingly was attended almost exclusively by women. (Here’s my review of the play.) I posted a Twitpic of the all-female crowd, which some people tried to call bullshit on because there was one woman who looked like a man. There was in fact one other man in attendance—a 60-something guy who came up to me afterwards and shook my shoulders in what I took to be a gesture of solidarity.

January 26: I stayed at an RV campground in Pipestone, Minnesota in 2008 to see a performance of the sorta-famous Hiawatha Pageant in its final year, and I earned a discount on my camping space by signing up for a free one-year membership in the Good Sam Club, an organization for people who stay at RV campgrounds. This gave the Good Sam Club the understandable but deeply mistaken impression that I am a person who owns an RV and enjoys camping (“camping”?) in it, and who therefore might be interested in renewing my membership. They also think my last name is “Gagler.”

I posted this Twitpic with the caption, “The Good Sam Club has some seriously mistaken ideas about me.” Good Sam apparently thought I was only referring to the spelling of my name.

January 31: When Alyssa Milano’s tweets about the situation in Egypt became widely-retweeted, I tweeted, “It tells you everything you need to know about Twitter that at moments of geopolitical crisis, @Alyssa_Milano becomes an opinion leader.”

Milano replied, “@JayGabler You’re not following the right people if you think that’s true.” This brought me to the attention of several people who apparently take time to investigate who Alyssa Milano’s tweeting at and why, and who tweeted angrily at me because of my seeming disrespect for her. One of them either accused me of “Gablerism” (or threatened me with being subjected to it; it wasn’t clear which), but Deb K was the most assiduous, issuing no fewer than a dozen tweets about the matter.

Among them were tweets addressed to Harvard, informing the university that one of its alumni was tweeting in an uncharitable fashion. Deb then felt compelled to reassure Harvard that my sarcastic tweet about Alyssa Milano hadn’t caused her to think poorly of all Harvard alumni—just me. Harvard declined to reply, but if a platoon of professors show up to revoke my Ph.D., I’ll know why.

February 6: I tweeted about how much I wanted some of the Chex Mix my housemates were making, and Chex Mix winked at me. Despite the fact that my coblogger Becky Lang is a member of the team who decide daily what Cheerios will say on Facebook, it still seems strange to me that a collection of tiny edibles have the wherewithal to hold a conversation.

February 8: This tweet seems completely ironic, but in fact I believe it was completely sincere.

February 6: I could explain this, but what fun would that be?

– Jay Gabler