“If your heart is a pillow, this love’s the bed.” – Chris Brown, Don’t Wake Me Up

I wish we could just not wake up Chris Brown. “Shh … Let him sleep on that metaphorical bed-shaped love … FOREVER [cackle].”

“Now you get to watch her leave out the window/
Guess that’s why they call it window pain.” – Eminim, Love the Way You Lie

It’s a little known fact that the creator of the window named that edge part of it the “pane” because looking out the window is sad cuz this girl is leaving and yeah …

“Ice on the fringe is so damn frosty/
The people like ‘Damn, that’s a cold ass honky'” – Macklemore, Thrift Shop

Macklemore, you calling yourself a ‘honky’ does mean you are self-aware enough to get away with being such a wangsta.

“And you would hide away and find your peace of mind/
With some indie record that’s much cooler than mine.” – Taylor Swift, We are Never Getting Back Together

Taylor, you just can’t have it all, ok. You are really rich and you get to date famous guys but that does not mean they will think your record is cooler than say, The XX or literally any other record that is not teen girl heartsick emo country.

“I wanna make you feel wanted.” – Hunter Hayes, Wanted

The idea that he imagines girls sitting around ‘wanting to feel wanted’ is eerily correct, as if he has been reading Cosmo and his little sister’s diary. Women prefer men not enter this realm of insecurity, thank you.

“After the war we said we’d fight together/
I guess we thought that’s just what humans do” – Ellie Goulding, Anything Could Happen

I just think she’s an alien and this proves it.

“So I know we got issues baby true, true, true/
But I’d rather work on this with you/
Than to go ahead and start with someone new” – Big Sean in Justin Bieber’s As Long as You Love Me

Anyone else bugged by this whole song? First of all, Bieber you can’t say you’d choose to be homeless to be with this girl. You’re really rich and probably glamorizing homelessness. Second of all, this statement is more un-romantic the younger the person saying it is. I get that Big Sean is rapping it but I still think, “Justin Bieber you’re like 20! Start over with someone new. You’re not a 35-year-old woman with a ticking biological clock!

Anyhoo, what lyrics bug you?

–Becky Lang