A 2013 Oscars Drinking Game

If a musical number opens the show, your drink must be done by the end of it.

Drink every time MacFarland slips into Stewie, twice if it’s Peter.

Drink every time MacFarland mentions/references The Simpsons.

Drink for every Star Wars/Disney reference.

Drink for every John Wilkes Booth reference.

Drink for every Jack Nicholson audience shot.

Drink for every Argofuckyourself reference.

Drink every time Tarantino flashes a peace sign.

Take one drink for each of the following names mentioned in a single sentence: Steven Spielberg, Daniel Day-Lewis, Sally Field, Tony Kushner, Tommy Lee Jones, and Abraham Lincoln. Multiple names per sentence are required. Mention of a single name doesn’t warrant a drink. For example, if someone says “It sure was great working with Steven Spielberg, Daniel Day Lewis, Sally Field, and Tommy Lee Jones on this movie,” take four drinks. Counts during nominations too. So when they announce Spielberg being nominated for directing Lincoln, drink twice.

Finish your drink every time Doris Kearns Goodwin is mentioned.

During the In Memoriam drink one for Charles Durning, Ben Gazzara, and Celeste Holm. Finish your drink if they end with Nora Ephron.

Drink if Brave doesn’t win Best Animated Feature.

Drink every time someone thanks or mentions their “team.”

Drink once for every pocket square. Finish your drink if it’s an ascot.

Drink for every blue dress that appears on stage. In case of ambiguity as to whether or not a dress is blue, majority rules.

Drink for every tuxedo sans traditional black bowtie.

Drink for every Spielberg audience shot, twice if Daniel Day-Lewis is also in the shot.

Drink every time a mention of Django Unchained is followed by a shot of a black actor.

If Joaquin Phoenix wins, finish your drink.

If Sally Field wins and references “you like me, you really like me,” finish your drink.

Drink if Salma Hayek’s cleavage is awesome.