Things the Antichrist Will Reveal Himself By Saying
“I don’t drink coffee.”
“I’m a social media marketing guru.”
“My Crocs need more Jibbitz.”
“Do Tegan and Sara ever hook up with each other?”
“Kids spend so much time texting, they’ve forgotten how to hold a real conversation.”
“I can’t eat that—I’m on a mineral-purge diet for another 37 days.”
“Men should never wear shorts.”
“The check comes to $18.50. You have a twenty? Yeah, just leave that. That’s fine.”
“Hey, show everyone that funny pig-nose thing you do!”
“We missed McDonald’s breakfast by five minutes? Oh well, no big deal.”