Leg warmers

Mickey Rourke’s career

Bret Michaels’ access to non-stop poon

Vinyl

Chucks

Cultural adoration for the hot dog

Beekeeping

Flannel

Rob Lowe’s career

The movies Hairspray, Rent, Scream and The Karate Kid

Madonna’s triceps

90210

Hugh Hefner’s libido

T-shirts featuring animals in front of aurora borealis lights

The name of the guy who invented Napster

Knitting

Every episode of Law and Order

Punky Brewster as the straight-haired friend of Sabrina the Teenage Witch

The McRib

–Becky Lang