Jay Gabler
TagMinnesota: Why Do We Live in This Godforsaken, Freezing State?
One of the myths about Minnesotans—perpetuated, often, by Minnesotans ourselves—is that the cold is something we “adapt to” or “get us..
Best/Realest Tweets of December
Some brilliant bastard convinced humans they need to pay exorbitant amounts of money for big sheets of toilet paper to put inside boxes.
— ..
“Lord of the Rings” Cast Commentary Drinking Game
Take a small sip when…
…someone gratuitously compliments another cast member (if you took a full drink every time this happened, yo..
“The Wolf of Wall Street”: A Guilt-Optional Pleasure
At one point in The Wolf of Wall Street, Jordan Belfort (Leonardo DiCaprio) notes incredulously that the federal investigator pursuing him..
Pros and Cons of Christmas Characters We’d Like to Fuck
Santa
Pros:
Has magic powers—if you know what we mean.
Likes going down.
He disappears by morning, but he always leaves a present.
..
“Saving Mr. Banks” flies like a lead kite
There’s a scene in Saving Mr. Banks where Walt Disney (Tom Hanks) tells a moving story about his childhood job delivering papers for his h..
More Helpful Craigslist Housing Categories
Unresolved sexual tension houses
Hook-up houses
Houses where everyone ignores each other
Houses where everyone hooks up and t..
Lessons Other Blockbusters Could Learn from “The Hunger Games: Catching Fire”
It’s the characters, stupid. A common complaint I have about movies—special-effects extravaganzas are particularly susceptible, but an..
Why You Shouldn’t Give Your Baby a Fisher-Price iPad Seat for Christmas
Like Matt Peckham and many commenters, I’m appalled—simply appalled—at the audacity of Fisher-Price. Those soulless bastards have take..
“The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug”: The elf rides again…and again
In the very first shot of The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug, director Peter Jackson is seen emerging from a Bree tavern, eating a ca..
90th Birthday Gifts for Bob Barker
A video montage, set to music by Sarah McLachlan, of all the cushions, legs, and stuffed animals his pro-neutering advocacy saved from..
Messages to Have Laser-Engraved On Your iPad Mini
My other iPad is huge I promise.
Please fill the void.
Here lies print.
Come at me, Kindle.
Dick may be larger than i..