Welcome to week 8 my crispy, meat-filled internet Hot Pockets! So much has changed in the world since our last installment of EWWIRU, don’t you think? For one, everyone has gotten way more opportunities to make jokes that use Old LeatherBag von Fangmouth’s (which is what I call Schwarzenegger) most famous catchphrases. For two, our local cool kids have a new hangout to Tweet about. (Surprise!They make their own ketchup!) And for three, a whole week’s worth of links have been scouted, asked to submit proposals, been considered carefully by a committee of their peers, asked to come back for a second round of interviews, and then finally got the call that they made it. They’re in. It’s a lot like the feeling expressed in that old song from the classic musical The Chorale String, where they all sing “GOoooosh I hope I made the cut! GoooosssSSH I hope I’m IN The Tangentiaaaaall (dramatic pause) THIS (dramatic pause for glissando) Weeeeeeek!” So just sing that little ditty to yourself. Oh please, I know you know all the words.

I’m bringing you the saltiest bits from the bottom of the chip bag this week. And that’s a good thing.

Items of Interest: Week of 5/18 – 5/24

The number one book on Amazon has not even been released yet and it’s a children’s book called “Go the F*ck to Sleep”. I guess that is pretty awesome. But not as awesome as this book, which is aimed at kids who have to deal with recognizing their own mother after she’s had plastic surgery. (It’s really worth taking a look at the Search Inside feature of this one. It’s weird.)

Thanks for the tip on that one JayZee!

This Twitter account is probably just someone’s attempt at getting a sitcom pilot (because that is what the world is coming to) but whatever – I started following it and it’s pretty funny. The thing is, everyone’s internet search history is pretty funny. And I should know because I keep breaking in to everyone’s computers and checking on them. What?! Oh it’s bad? How do you think I go about coming up with all these links for you every week??

Meanwhile in Australia….
whatisplankingwhatisplankingwhatisplanking?

And why are people doing it until they literally die?

(photo via Pictures of Planking, duh)

Oh, because it’s pretty dangerous. Well stop it then! This doesn’t even seem like it would be a thrill – it just means you have strong abs and a strong back. Actually, that would be pretty thrilling for me.

On the other end of the spectrum – this baby is just straight chillin’. Which I guess all babies do on some level, but this one is funny because it’s acting kind of like a grown-up and things that are disparate are funny to us as humans. See? Humor is best when it’s really, really broken down for you.

This Croatian museum is hip and sad. I imagine their gift shop is filled with lovely leather-bound journals, memory boxes, and vials of other people’s tears. Oh good! They serve mulled wine and something called pepper cookies at the Museum of Broken Relationships cafe. That’s how you know you are still in Croatia.

Well guys, the war on corn just got less messy. Just put a spaceship around that cob!

– Emily Weiss