“Crocodile Rock” Elton John
Sex scenario: Outercourse (possibly on a dare)
“Backfield in Motion,” Mel & Tim
Sex scenario: Doggy-style
“Little Red Corvette,” Prince
Sex scenario: Symphorophilia
“Together at Last,” Annie soundtrack
Sex scenario: Friends resolving longstanding sexual tension
“Hurts So Good,” John Mellencamp
Sex scenario: Autoerotic asphyxiation
“Can I Touch You…There?”, Michael Bolton
Sex scenario: 1995
”And I’m Telling You I’m Not Going” – from Dreamgirls.
Sex scenario: Any, really. This is really mean and aggressive and selfish.
“College Girls Are Easy,” Beastie Boys
Sex scenario: Dorm room.
“Ben,” Michael Jackson
Sex scenario: Bestiality
“4’33”,” John Cage
Sex scenario: Conceptual sex
“A Change is Gonna Come,” Sam Cooke
Sex scenario: Hand job
”Lemon Incest,” Serge Gainsbourg.
Sex scenario: Incest.
“Dance With My Father” Luther Vandross
Sex scenario: Oh wait, incest again!
“James and the Giant Peach” soundtrack – all of it
Sex scenario: It’s going well but they keep mentioning a sad little boy named “James” that totally cancels out the sexy peach references.
“Detachable Penis,” King Missile
Sex scenario: John and Lorena Bobbitt
“My Sharona” by The Knack
Scenario: Statutory rape?
“Daughters” by John Mayer
Sex scenario: Sex with someone’s daughter, which is surprisingly frequent
“His Eye Is On The Sparrow,” Traditional
Sex Scenario: Funeral Sex, Church Sex
“Lip Gloss,” Lil Mama
Sex Scenario: Aggressively long blow job
Garrison Keillor sings his sonnet.
Sex scenario: Sex with Garrison Keillor.
Leave a Reply