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About Emily Weiss

Lives in Minneapolis and is the director of publicity for a media group. She writes sometimes on her food blog, less often for Twin Cities Daily Planet, and just a couple of times for The Hairpin, but it was cool because that’s how she met Becky Lang. She will probably talk your ear off if you ever meet IRL and mention any of the following: My Strange Addiction, small/out-of the way bakeries, doll houses, Anne of Green Gables, injury stories, Goodwill by the pound, Real Housewives of Anything, fears, pudding.

Website

http://fuckyeahoriginalbecky.tumblr.com

Great Babies of History: Jordy Lemoine

Great Babies of History: Jordy Lemoine
These days, you can’t go anywhere without hearing about Beyoncé and Jay-Z’s unborn child, a.k.a. “Destiny’s Child”, a.k.a. Bey-Jay II (which is what they should name the baby if it comes out and is a dinosaur movie). It might be fake ! Its crib is a mansion ! Shouldn’t they be “a little bit scared to leave their baby in such a huge room?” (Real and very good question asked by the reporter in that video.) But it doesn’t seem fair that Beyjayby is taking...

Scott Caan’s Agent Pitches Some New Scott Caan Vehicles

Scott Caan’s Agent Pitches Some New Scott Caan Vehicles
An ABC Family movie of the week where Scott Caan plays a high school English teacher who rehabilitates prisoners by encouraging them to write poetry in “Prose and Caans”. A miniseries set in the mid-1860s, Scott Caan is a gender-bending labor foreman by day and an undercover saloon girl by night in “The TransCaantinental Railroad”. Scott Caan stars in a CBS dramedy about revolving door politics and falling back in love with his ex-wife in “Caanflict of Interest”. A weekly vote off reality show where...

Things Samantha Jones Whispered To Me During Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part II

Things Samantha Jones Whispered To Me During Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part II
“What’s the big deal about this Elder wand? If you ask me, I’d rather see his Younger wand.” “What? Yes?” (every time someone says ‘horcrux’) “If Neville’s Longbottom is any indication of the rest of him, sign me up!” “Mmm I have something very similar to Bellatrix’s outfit in my vault but it’s red and instead of opening it with the help of a goblin, you open it with the help of your butt cheeks.” “I’d go to Hogwarts for the clothes alone! I just...

Social(ish) Media Founders and CEOs in Order of Attractiveness: #6-1

Social(ish) Media Founders and CEOs in Order of Attractiveness: #6-1
6. Evan Williams – Twitter “My favorite authors are Russian and the first big purchase I made when the cash started flowing was a custom-made $8,000 mattress, but that doesn’t mean I won’t still go with you when you are in the mood for Famous Dave’s.” 5. Billy Chasen – turntable.fm I bet it’s hard to be taken seriously in the business world when you insist on going by “Billy” but this adorable mop-head shut up every naysayer when he figured out how to open...

Social(ish) Media Founders and CEOs in Order of Attractiveness: #12- 7

Social(ish) Media Founders and CEOs in Order of Attractiveness: #12- 7
12. Jakob Lodwick – Vimeo Emily – you goof! You mixed up this picture of Vimeo founder and notorious asshat Jakob Lodwick with any/every picture you found on LATFH! He repulses me on an intimate level, but I am being a SERIOUS JOURNALIST here and so I have determined that he is, empirically, more attractive than Chad Hurley. But I still want to stand far away from him at a bar and roll my eyes in his general direction. 11. Michael Breidenbruecker – Last.fm “Oh...

Social(ish) Media Founders and CEOs in Order of Attractiveness: # 17-13

Social(ish) Media Founders and CEOs in Order of Attractiveness: # 17-13
17. Reid Hoffman – LinkedIn Predictably, the LinkedIn crowd is at the bottom of the list here. Sorry Reid. I’m sure you are charitable and “really so super sweet. Like seriously, such a teddy bear.” 16. Konstantin Guericke – LinkedIn Zachary Ty Bryan, this guy has 90 million dollars!! Oh to be clear, I don’t think Konstantin looks like Zachary Ty Bryan, it’s just an interjection I am trying to make happen. Maybe the interjection I should try to make happen is “90 Million Dollars!”...

Some Funny Things to Name Your Hermit Crab

Some Funny Things to Name Your Hermit Crab
10. Mr. Crabbypants McCrabberson III 9. Lenny Harris 8. Noah John Rondeau 7. Shelley Long 6. Claus 5. Keith Hopwood 4. St. Jerome 3.Thomas Pynchon 2. Shy Guy 1. Thomas PINCHon - Emily Weiss

Collegiate Haute Cuisine: Recipes For the Poor and Shameless

Collegiate Haute Cuisine: Recipes For the Poor and Shameless
Crunch Burrito Skill Level: Easy Special Equipment: Microwave Ingredients: Flour tortilla, canned refried beans, Fritos/Doritos/Tortilla Chips Instructions: Search EVERYWHERE for a frickin’ can opener. No one has one? How can we not have a can opener? What is this, Russia? How about the kitchenette in the lounge – not there either? No can opener but like 30 pairs of chopsticks? GROAN. NERTS! Start knocking on doors. Ask Holly, the responsible den mother type on your floor. She totally has one. Open can with some difficulty...

Emily’s Wacky Wednesday Internets Round-Up: Week 9

Emily's Wacky Wednesday Internets Round-Up: Week 9
Well, it finally happened guys. I fell off the EWWIRU wagon. It’s a small wagon – less like the haunted hay ride at Spookyworld and more like one of those carts they have for little kids at the grocery store – but it’s a wagon I was riding (pulling?) for 8 weeks strong and now I have to come back to you shoulders slumped, wearing a hair shirt, and self-flagellating in a public shame parade of my own making. Don’t be surprised you run into...

Unsigned Indie Bands Found in Names of Tangential Writers

Unsigned Indie Bands Found in Names of Tangential Writers
Ah, Ditch Size! Clan By Keg Princess Bit Sissy Crotch Knot Silently Evil Lad Banjo’s Zeal We Smell Hatchet Brocade Shits Ajar By Leg Nibs Triceps Tiny Cocks Shorts The Maybe Cat Divas Yell Lentil The Pretend Skis Ease Hurrah Karmic Sail Chum Is Senora Kites Kitschy Consorts - Emily Weiss likes anagrams Photo via Hipster Runoff

Services Menu at The Tangential Inner Beauty Salon (Midwest Location)

Services Menu at The Tangential Inner Beauty Salon (Midwest Location)
Welcome to The Tangential Inner Beauty Salon. Before you enter the premises please remove your shoes as we believe that dirt from the soles represents the dirt in your soul. Also, no menstruating women. Your experience begins with our signature Selfishness Enema. Enjoy the benefits of having one of our Inner Beauty consultants flush your system of toxins, nest-feathering, jealousy, ego, tested-on-bunnies eyeshadow, and general sticky-icky feeling. Both your peers and your colon will thank you. For those having that less-than-fresh battle with inconstancy with...

10 Years of Names of Bachelor/ette Contestants

10 Years of Names of Bachelor/ette Contestants
Presented without comment: Mathue Krisily Chantal Moana Bevin Trista Bentley Vienna Donato Spero Tenley Kiptyn Kasey Tanner Marshana Lanny Rozlyn Treasure Shayne Rigina Blakeney Compiled by Emily Weiss