Katie Sisneros
TagWays to Make Vegetables Unhealthy, Ranked in Order of Awesomeness
5. Butter + Brussels Sprouts. Here’s Katie’s “Down Home Cookin’ Recipe” for Brussels sprouts that would have Paula Deen dry heaving in..
Creative Ways to Hint at Someone that You’re Going to Murder Them
Walk up to them and just start measuring their limbs and torso with a tape measure. When they ask what the hell you’re doing, just ans..
Educated Guesses on the Sex Lives of Grown-Up Nicktoons Characters
Chuckie Finster, Rugrats: Chuckie first got drunk when he was nineteen, alone in his basement, after stumbling upon the key to his dad..
Father’s Day Gifts to Make Your Dad Confused About The Current State of Culture
Lil B’s “I’m Gay”
Bacon soap
Steve-O’s memoir
Macho Dolls
A new vinyl record by a band whose members are all teenagers
..
I Don’t Like Purses: A Shitty Cartoon
Cable Television Scares the Shit Out of Me
Three-years-ago me couldn’t possibly fathom a world without cable television. What would such a world look like? How long would I survive?..
Dear All Boys
Hey. Girl here. Just chilling on my couch with my vagina, which you don’t have. This fact marks the most obvious difference between me and..
Mundane Signs that You’re an Adult
You roll over in the morning and realize you really need to get out of bed, but nobody is going to make you, and rebelling against you..
What Anxiety Feels Like
The catalyst is usually relatively benign, but as someone prone to anxiety you’re adept at taking the mundane and feeding it through a..
An Open Letter to My New Rollerblades
Hey, Alec. Hey, Stephen. I’ve named you after the two best Baldwin brothers (one being the actual best and the other being the ironic ..
How to Eat a Sushi Roll
1. Order a sushi roll. Which one you choose is relatively inconsequential, although this process will be made all the more hilarious i..
How to Turn a Garden into Your Lost Childhood in 5 Easy Steps
In front of my house there is (or rather was, before I mauled the shit out of it with a tiny rake) a displeasing stretch of weeds. Bec..