What It’s Like to Work the Worst Job in America
My job is the worst job in the United States. According to Career Cast’s annual “best and worst 200 jobs” list, my vocation is worse t..
Five Fantasies to Motivate Your Summer Run
Bear Apocalypse
A variation on the zombie virus, bearitis is sweeping North America. It’s like any zombie plague, except instead of..
What It’s Like to Quit Drinking at 24
Photo by Michelle Ress
“I’m never drinking again.”
We’ve all groaned it from the kitchen floor or beneath the arm of an unplanned be..
The Five Everyday Struggles of a Curly-Haired Woman
1. General wildness
Curly hair is unpredictable. When you’re a little kid, it’s cute, but once you hit puberty, those soft ringlets..
On Being a Liberal Suffering From Conservative Episodes
I’m a pretty liberal person. I grew up with a lesbian pastor and parents who earnestly campaigned for an opera hall to be built in lie..
Lessons I Learned in Christian Grade School
Dogs don’t have souls. Don’t let those wagging tails and the limitless, unconditional affection fool you. Dogs are for hunting, and fo..
Honest Answers to Common Job Interview Questions
Tell me a little about yourself.
As you may have noticed, I’m quite short, I compulsively destroy my cuticles when I’m nervous, and..
12 Things I’ve Learned in 2012
1. Your 24-year-old metabolism has not become a glacier, it’s just a little harder to get it out of bed in the morning.
2. If you flo..
Guy-to-Girl Online Dating Messages Decoded
“hello qt wha’s good I am a fun loving adventurous spirit always up for trying new things ;)”
Translation: I want to have anal sex ..
Curiosities Produced by Counseling
-How many butts have sat in this chair today, and how big were they? Are we all creating an everlasting, one-size-fits-all ass dent, c..
Things I’ve Been Observed Doing While Sleepwalking, Ages 4-23
Age: 4
Witness: My parents
Description: I make a habit of walking into my parents’ bedroom and standing at their bedside, releasing ..
How Mitt Romney Coped Today
Mitt Romney wakes at 5 AM underneath navy blue billion-thread count sheets at a hotel that costs more per night than the average Ameri..