Author: Marcus Michalik
-
Whitney gets one last curtain call in the otherwise turgid Sparkle
There’s a moment in Sparkle where Whitney Houston’s stern matriarch character looks directly at her fame-seeking daughters over Sunday lunch and asks with her trademark rasp, “Is my life not enough of a cautionary tale for you?” It’s impossible not to think of the real life Whitney when hearing that line, and it’s with rather…
-
One Compulsive TV Watcher’s 2012 Fantasy Emmy Noms
Outstanding Drama Series Game of Thrones (HBO) The Good Wife (CBS) Homeland (SHO) Justified (FX) Luck (HBO) Mad Men (AMC) WINNER: Mad Men One of the chief complaints about the Emmys is how often they get stuck in repetitive holding patterns and reward the same thing year after year. Normally I’d find it boring that…
-
America’s Next Top Model Finale Recap: An “Illuminata” Princess is Crowned
She flirted with it all season, but I really have to give props to Tyra for taking until the finale to directly compare the season’s Brits vs. Yanks theme to the Revolutionary War. As Sophie and Lauren stood before the Great and Powerful T with their hands politely folded and legs firmly planted in front…
-
America’s Next Top Model Recap: The Sweet Smell of Third Place
First off, let me apologize for missing last week’s recap. I didn’t see the episode until the weekend, and by that point it seemed a little pointless. Pity too, because last week, with its action movie stunts, hysterical heights-induced crying and shocking double elimination, might have been the most fun episode of the year, barring…
-
America’s Next Top Model Recap: Don’t Have Macau, Man!
The last two episodes of Top Model have been so low-key and normal that I’m starting to get flashbacks to seasons 2 & 3. While we’ll never be so lucky to have the show bring back the long-forgotten in-panel challenges (remember when Yaya correctly called out Tyra’s ethnocentrism during one of these by refusing to…
-
A Somewhat Comprehensive List of Reasons Why I Envy Women
-You got to grow up wearing Lip Smackers. I was always secretly hoping men would try to get in on this because they smelled delicious and didn’t even really leave a tint on your lips. Plus, I guarantee you that whatever woman is currently kissing Clive Owen or Daniel Craig is secretly wishing that his…
-
America’s Next Top Model Recap: A Fiercely Real Goodbye
By this point I’m so used to covering my face in horror and shame at Tyra’s attention-grabbing antics (don’t ever change, Ty) that I’m never quite sure what to do with myself when Top Model somehow manages to pull off an episode that’s almost entirely free of made-up words and our beautiful host’s foam-at-the-mouth self-delusions.…
-
America’s Next Top Model Recap: More Toochin’, Less Bullyin’
I’m guessing Tyra can’t even remember whether or not Top Model has centered a challenge around anti-bullying ever since Glee and Lady Gaga made it into last year’s important zeitgeist-y social issue, but she sure as hell wasn’t going to take any chances and let the opportunity to deeply inspire pass her by completely. You…
-
America’s Next Top Model Recap: The Art of the Booty Tooch
Top Model may already be a handful of eliminations into its current Americans versus Brits season, and while editor Becky Lang and I have been secretly keeping an eye out on the show to make sure Bankable Studios isn’t in the process of covertly trying to reignite the Revolutionary War (now sponsored by Cover Girl!),…
-
In Memory of Whitney: 5 Favorite Tracks
My family got cable TV in the fall of 1995. As a second grader, my initial reaction of complete and utter joy had pretty much everything to do with the promise of not having to watch episodes of Doug and Clarissa Explains It All at my friends’ houses any longer, but it was only a…
-
In Defense of Community: Why It’s The Best Comedy on TV
At what point is it fair to criticize a television show for it not being exactly what you want it to be? I asked myself this question earlier today reading editor Becky Lang’s article The Problem With Community, which basically, and rather bizarrely, takes NBC’s wildly inventive cult comedy to task for not adhering to…
-
11 Stupid Things I Collected as a Child
Beanie Babies I spent every Saturday morning in 1997 and 1998 digging though a crib full of freshly shipped beanbag animals alongside a bunch of middle-aged housewives. I had to get there early or else the only choice you’d have would be Gracie the swan, and I’d already bought that one weeks prior when I…