Rationalizing Your Teenage Daughter’s Sexy Facebook Photos

Rationalizing Your Teenage Daughter’s Sexy Facebook Photos


Over 20 likes! That must be due to the stunning composition of this photo. The seemingly nonchalant way that she took this in our bathroom is brilliant… so casual, yet meticulously planned. Even a passing observer would also point out the intentional low-resolution of this snapshot. The subtle pixelation may have been intentional, or simply the result of a low-quality camera phone… like all great art, that’s up to the viewer to interpret. Bravo, Katie.

And look at all of these nice young men commenting on her photo. They are all so friendly, leaving smiley-faces and wink-faces at the end of each comment. These must be those new older college boys that she’s been talking to so much! I hope to meet them one day.

They all seem to be commenting on her top-tier genetics. This is truly a testament to our family’s gene pool, and these are compliments that the whole family tree can take to heart. The “hot fucking body” comment that one gentleman left must be a reference to her prominent and flawless collarbone, something that our family has prided itself on for years. The whole lineage can really treat these comments as compliments.

And her smile, so cute. Just as precious as when she was graduating middle school… two years ago. Katie has always been known for her wide range of emotions, as evident by her Facebook statuses that ride a roller coaster of feelings. “I fucking hate boys,” “I’m so alone,” and “guys only want one thing” leave the reader challenged to interpret these tongue-in-cheek, expertly composed declarations about the troubles of being a young woman in 2012.

And how about the description she wrote below her photo: “#YOLO.” That’s right Katie, you only love once. I always knew that our family’s strong moral code continued in you. Your mother and I are so proud!

-By John Canover

Photo by Nomanson