Just imagine it. You get up at 7 – a full hour, at least, before your regular wakeup time – and check the temperature. Perfect. A cool 56 degrees. You make a banana smoothie with protein powder and throw in just a little fish oil so you can get those Omega 3’s. Then you put on your Nike Free foot-shaped running shoes, plug in your Nike Running iPod connector thingy, and hit the road.

If you’re a girl, your boobs have just the right amount of bounciness. Not too painful, not obscene, but just enough to make you feel both fit and feminine. If you’re a boy, you feel that somehow this running is improving your deltoids. That was unexpected, but you’re definitely not complaining. Looks like that girl in the folkband down the street has noticed as well.

You run around your nearest lake, so glad you quit smoking so you can breathe in the morning air. While you run, you think about the rhythm of your own breathing, and structure the outline for a novel in your head. After 45 minutes, you get back and can’t wait to dig into a bowl of Grape Nuts. Fiber time!

Think about this as you actually wake up, after pressing the snooze button 4 times. Plan the next day that you could conceivably do this as you have your morning cigarette while sitting on the dirty rug on your porch. It probably won’t be for at least 3 weeks. You are a busy, in demand person, with no time to run aimlessly! Give up on the idea as you pour yourself a bowl of Reeses Puffs. If you don’t have to go to work, watch Regis and Kelly. Admire Kelly Rippa’s biceps, and pledge to workout, when you finally get the time.

–Becky Lang