Ranking Today’s Biggest Genres of Stoner Music

Ranking Today’s Biggest Genres of Stoner Music

Weed rap: I tried to find the exact definition of “weed rap,” for this article, but I mostly ended up on a bunch of Yahoo! answers forums talking about whether or not Curren$y was weed rap or way above that “poser shit.”

It seems that the big debate in weed rap right now is “Is it a feeling, or is it just rapping about weed?” Regardless, I like the possibilities that weed rap represents – mostly, more rapping about snacks, sitting on the couch and watching daytime TV. I’ll take that over Kanye rapping about his jaw injury or uppity rappers promoting good-feeling social sentiment anytime. Also I just really like Das Racist.

Freak-folk: This includes Animal Collective and the many, many Animal Collective rip-off bands that have succeeded them. This music is full of pretty colors, ugly textures, cryptic yet relatable lyrics, the feeling of birds drinking chocolate milk, backward-facing nun habits, people being stuck in balloons, half-remembered Roald Dahl books and other things that people like to trip out to on YouTube.

Beach rock: Beach rock is how slightly not-self-conscious, happy stoners make music when they didn’t get the memo that they’re supposed to be complicated and philosophical and miserable. They keep it lo-fi because that makes it sound fuzzy and warm, like it’s from a better decade, when surfing was more legit and less Hollywood. I had not realized a) that this music is stonery or b) that I have so much of it on my iPod, until a recent road trip, where I was told all I listen to was “stonery, lo-fi beach rock.”

Chillwave: Originally also called “glo-fi,” although that name seems to have been dropped, chillwave is music that is too boring to listen to not-fucked-up, but perfect for having sex to, writing a paper to or sticking on the teasers for Portlandia. It is too mellow to be totally accessible, but wholly unobjectionable and nice.

Deadhead shit: Some stoners listen to Phish and The Grateful Dead. In fact, these might be original stoners, or kids from small towns who don’t know what Gorilla vs. Bear is and have no concept of how to join a subculture. Grateful Dead is hard to write off, but Phish fucking blow really, really hard.

Becky Lang