Lisa Frank Backpack, Trapper-keeper, Folders, Notebooks, Pencil Box, Pencils, Sharpeners, Erasers, etc.
The Lisa Frank collection appeals to a very specific audience: drama queens. Beyond the fact that you’re simply spoiled, daddy bought you everything they make with a unicorn on it, so you can’t see how crappy life really is. Basically, that smiley polar bear and his puffin friends are distracting you from your parents’ messy divorce.
Future career: Hair stylist

Justin Bieber notebooks and folders, pack of multi-colored pens, plain pencils, plain backpack
You’re pretty average, as far as teens go. You easily fall victim to pop culture, but so do all your friends. You chose Bieber over kittens in a basket because you want boys to know you’re interested in the opposite sex. You use your pink and purple pens to write and fold little notes covered in doodled hearts and leave them in your crush’s locker.
Future career: Accountant

Tear-proof fabric trapper keeper stuffed with loose leaf, wheelie backpack, mechanical pencils
You came to do business, as if it wasn’t obvious from the sound of your backpack racing through the halls. You arrive in class and slap that trapper keeper on the desk. Bam. You’ve got it all in there: pens, designated folder for each class, calculator, daily planner. You’re unstoppable. The only question is, why are you carrying your trapper, and what is in your backpack? Only your mom knows.
Future career: Engineer

Plain notebooks purchased in bulk, sharpies, rollerball pens, Moleskine, headphones
Plain notebooks mean you’re either on a budget or fighting the mainstream. You probably don’t even own a backpack because you only bring the “essentials” to school. You keep your pens in your pocket and don’t even care which one you grab. (Whoa.) You show your apathy by doing math assignments in Sharpie and writing your name in all capital letters. You see how pointless junior high is to your future, so you spend most of your time drawing anime characters on your notebooks.
Future Career: Artist/Musician

Cigarettes, pocket knife
Your mom is probably really caring and oblivious to your problems; she actually bought you all the necessary school supplies, but you hate school and hate her love even more. You’ve carved your name on nearly every desk in your English classroom and wrote “Karen is a fat bitch” in a bathroom stall. You just wish people would stop being so fake with their “we’re only trying to help you succeed” propaganda.
Future career: Prisoner/Single Parent

–Heidi Thomasoni had Yikes! erasers and grew up to write for The Tangential.

Photo by EvelynGiggles (Creative Commons)