Be part of a legendary band that broke up years ago; get back together as a new thing.
Be a legendary band that never broke up.
Imitate the Smiths as closely as you can; you’ll inevitably do something slightly different, and hence be acclaimed as original.
Be a hip-hop act; signal your irony by giving gonzo interviews.
Be a synthpop act; do absolutely nothing to betray any hint of irony whatsoever.
Have controversial views about rape. (“Controversial views” = say you’re going to do it all the time)
Have adorable beards.
Loop your vocals until you sound like a million mermaids.
Play sets that start with two short songs, segue into long jams, then end with two more short songs.
Lock yourself in a basement for three years with nothing but Cheetos, Mountain Dew, a drum machine, a keyboard, a mixer, and a kazoo.
Above: Julianna Barwick at Pitchfork 2011. Photo by Jay Gabler.