10 Tattoos to Get While Drunk this Weekend – By Al Mueller

10 Tattoos to Get While Drunk this Weekend – By Al Mueller

Al Mueller is releasing a book tonight. It looks like this:

And has lines like this:

That simple-minded-girl-with-a-little-of-the-ready had really started to stick in my mind, her body fits well against other bodies I recalled from a possibly imagined Hemingway book I thought I read in jail.

If you live in Minneapolis, come hang out with us at the book release party tonight at Cult Status Gallery. If you don’t, read an excerpt here, and/or Al’s tattoo notes, below.

Artist’s notes:

Slut Book- This is a perfect tattoo for someone who is both literary and loves to get it on.  Simple yet effective, think of placing it on your wrist so when paying at the bookstore the cashier will start to quiver when you hand them a bill.

Penis Leaves-  This tattoo is really awesome if you’re me and have a terrible secret you can’t tell anyone so you use cute things like leaves and berries to hide it.

Los Crazies Locos-  This is a gang I’m in with two real Mexicans and one sort of Mexican.  We speak Spanish, eat tacos, and are still accepting members, although the initiation involves fisting which some people find tedious.

David Bowie-  David Bowie was a famous musician so that’s why this tattoo is cool.

Wrinkly/veiny Girl-  This tattoo is perfect if you’re my girlfriend and you’ve already done so many horrible things in life that getting a really twisted self-portrait of yourself doesn’t even rank on the list.

Cosmic Watermelon- This tattoo is sweet because it’s summertime and that means watermelon.  Also watermelons are way easier to graphically render than broccoli or pomegranate.

Dancing Hot Dog w/halo – If you don’t get why this would be a cool tattoo I can’t be bothered trying to explain it to you.

Titty dollar-  This is the tattoo that pretty much says it all: Money, women, lactation, the angelic. Is it sexist, or just sexy? Probably both.

Hot Chix Heart-  This tattoo would be way funnier if I didn’t actually have it on my leg, carved in with a razor blade one drunken night a long time ago in a galaxy far far away, you know, the one where I think I’m a lot funnier than I really am.

I’m trying dagger-  Because, you know, I really am.