Things Kim Kardashian Can Do If Kris Humphries Moves Back to Hopkins
-Lifeguard at Lake Calhoun
-Macy’s Perfume Counter Girl
-Shot girl at Brother’s Bar and Grill
-Butt model at MCAD
-Open “Dash MPLS”
-State Fair rodeo clown
-Forget to wear make-up to “fit in”
-SMILF (Soccer Mom I’d Like to Fuck)
-“I Get That A Lot”: Mall of America Edition
-GTL
-Edina Country Club member
-Lotion and/or hair straightener kiosk girl
-Force Barfly to be less quaint than a club
-Lead a Seminar
-Bother Prince with demo CDs, include song titled, “I dance now, Prince”
-Become the Raspberry Festival Queen
-“Kim Takes Minneapolis”
-Start a dairy farm; claim, “Milk is the new Quick Trim.”
-Get a divorce