Mid By Midwest is an annual event where Midwesterners from the middle of the snow-covered region do the same stuff they do the rest of the year. 

For those getting to MXMW early this year, on Tuesday night word has it that over in the Whittier neighborhood of Uptown, several festival attendees can be found thinking about going to the Triple Rock for 2-4-1s. Things get really exciting when the clock strikes one in the morning and they realize it’s probably too late to go out because they lost track of time watching a half dozen DVRed episodes of Law and Order.

Wednesday morning is when things really kick off. Local music blog Gimme Noise has an exclusive lead that the place to be for for the hippest of MXMW-goers is most certainly–at work. Dressed in their finest business casual outfits, partiers will jam out to the tunes of Pandora and Cities 97 on their headphones (so as not to disturb their cubicle mates without MXMW-badges).

The fun continues on Thursday, when a couple St. Paul MXMW-goers are throwing a two-person party that promises to involve “sniffing poppers” and watching YouTube. We can’t give away the exact location, so make sure you ask around.

Winding down the week, several MXMW attendees will be meeting at a Dinkytown cafe to read their phones and complain about how many SXSW tweets are in their Twitter stream. They are rumored to be taking the afterparty to The Library Bar, where they will sip beer and complain about the constant stream of frat bros with fake IDs.

Don’t think the weekend of MXMW isn’t going to be crazy. Local gossip blog LOL-OMG has made a whole list of their top picks for events, which includes listening to Rebecca Black on repeat, going to thrift stores to find new deer antlers for the doorway, spinning vinyl with a certain DJ who knows his whitening toothpaste at Club Jager and trying to tweet something funny enough to end up on Weekend Twitterings.

It’s gonna be a wild one, kids, so get your Red Bull and your slightly less heavy parka ready!

–Sarah Heuer and Becky Lang aren’t going to SXSW and totally aren’t bitter about it at all