Heidi Thomasoni
TagThings Unfunny People Say to be Funny
“You’d think . I guess that is just too much to ask.”
Examples:
“You’d think everyone knows simple algebra. I guess that is just t..
Do Not Trick-or-Treat At My Door Unless You Are Seeking Disappointment
I had heard about these other houses as “the one that gives out king-size candy bars” or “the one that gives out dollar bills.” Frankl..
Confessions of a Skater Girl
Confession #1: I did it for the boys.
My neighbor, whom I knew since we were in elementary school, grew up to be a hunky chunk of s..
Fool-proof Ways to Survive a Haunted House
Close your eyes. If you can’t see it, it can’t scare you, right? Make sure you’ve already established the group leader, and grip onto ..
Things I’ve Learned As A Serial Cereal Monogamist
A couple weeks ago, Becky wrote a post about being a serial monogamist. I realized I have a similar problem: I have long-term relation..
Please Shut Up About Kissing in the Rain
Who decided kissing in the rain was the only way to convey a sense of desperate passion? (Because I convey this quite well in any weat..
Things My Peephole Has Potentially Saved Me From
Santa. A few days ago I stepped outside my door to find a Santa Suit arranged perfectly on the ground, like Santa had simply disintegrat..
On Teaching My First Day of High School
My first day of school, I pulled into a crowded parking lot of Range Rovers and Audis. “Crap,” I thought. “They all drive better cars ..
Things I Really Wanted to Say to Zac Hanson
I interviewed my childhood crush Zac Hanson (of Hanson) yesterday for the TC Daily Planet. I really wanted to say:
“I used to prete..
I’m Sorry, I Thought You Meant the Other Kind of Camping
I just got your e-mail with the camping details, and I’m sorry, but I’m not sure this is going to work. I know I was really..
How to Make Me Cry
Get a marching band. There’s something about a marching band that gets me every time. If the marching band is for something I did, I l..
My Love Confession to Jim Carrey
This letter is for Jim Carrey because I can’t record a video without laughing.
Jim. I just wanted you to know that I think you’re a..