Tag: Christopher Vondracek
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Hipster Pope Names
Pope Cumberbatch VIII Pope DIIV Pope John Paul Collective Pope Austin SXSW Pope Warby Parker I pOpE Pope Indifferent Pope Kashi Go Lean Pope John Misty Pope? Pope. Pope Generation X Pope Pulp the Juice Pope Olivia Pope of ABC’s runaway hit show Scandal Pope Just a Second I’m Tweeting This Pope to the Maxx Pope…
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52 Things From the 90s That No One Misses
“Hidden tracks” after ten minutes of silence at the end of albums Dial-up Internet, and the sound it made Vice President Dan Quayle When MTV only played music videos Jay Leno being taken seriously Palm Pilots Hotmail BK Knights NBA Jam Having your little sister die from a Ring Pop mishap Chicken Soup for the…
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Sexts from the Sea
I am wet for you Motorboat all over me Drill me until you accidentally poke a lost sea diver skeleton I’m overflowing with lust for you … Watch out New Orleans Come explore my lost city of poontang It’s been awhile … I’m getting sandy down there I’m so oiled up that birds are dying…
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Alternative Thanksgiving Menus
Vegan Thanksgiving: Tofurkey and soy potatoes. Gratuitously Carnivorous Thanksgiving: Bacon-wrapped turducken. Charlie Brown Thanksgiving: Jelly beans, pretzel sticks, popcorn, and toast. Texas Thanksgiving: Sour milk and secession fries. Grandma’s Nursing Home Thanksgiving: Jell-O, maybe some salt packets. International-Student-Staying-in-the-Dorm Thanksgiving: Sysco gravy and turkey burned by the Ukrainian RA. Dirty Hipster Thanksgiving: PBR, and ten bags…