About Chrissy Stockton
One of the two writers of the esteemed Philolzophy, a blog about theory, pop-culture, cats, vodka and pretending to do meth. Newly a Catholic. Host of the official Tangenitalia Ravetreat
Mountain Range or Hipster Baby Name?
Ahmer Pirin Amaro Ruby Atlas Wicklow Rif Bale Entoto Pioneer Elk Rila Golden Everett Erta Kilimanjaro Driftless Area Stone Bruce Kipengere Lebombo Franklin Joy Castle Clearwater Kokanee Davis Laguna Owl Mahale Pare Kuray Madison Owen Stanley Boulder Pamir Sierra Pierce Tian Shan Sesvenna Bear River Dauphine Selasitsa Harz Massiff Pelly Blue - Chrissy Stockton is just kidding—they’re all mountain ranges. Photo by Varun Mehta (Creative Commons)
Deep Philosophical Questions Inspired by the “Fright Night” Remake
Why isn’t the plot anything like the original? Are you responsible for decisions made under the influence? If you decide to drive while drunk, you go to jail even though your decision was impaired. If vampire movies teach us anything, it’s that someone can go from friendly human to bloodthirsty vampire with one bite. But, being unable to consent to turning into a vampire, are people really responsible for what they do under inebriation? If the bulked-up Colin Farrell wanted to kill you by biting...
Deep Philosophical Questions Raised by the Film Noir “Final Destination 5″
On Wednesday I was lucky enough to attend the sausage fest (it was hosted by a station called “Jack FM”) that was the advance screening of the latest installment of the Final Destination series. It was in 3D. This means we saw people get impaled in three dimensions. Whoa. Anyways, despite all the flashy death scenes and big Hollywood budget, this film could hold its own against any Joseph Gordon-Levitt-starring indie film in a meta-off. In fact, Final Destination 5 rivals The Iliad in...
My Favorite Whiners
Whining is a seriously undervalued skill. What people have to understand is that things can always be better. No matter how good the moment is, we should appreciate those who take the opportunity to point out things that could make it better. These non-conformists are smart and approach problems in new ways. Thirsty? Lay down on the couch and complain that you’re parched. Voila! Someone brings you a water. You wouldn’t believe how many suckers would just get their own drink. Anyways, as a whine-connoisseur...
The Joy of Going Out (+ How to Do It Better)
A lot of people think going out is intuitive–all you really need is some friends and someplace that serves alcohol, right? It’s easy to acquire all the ingredients of a truly great night, but assembling them is trickier than you’d expect. Things go wrong, people don’t clique or get tired, a bar is surprisingly dead, bad music, etc. As a seven year veteran of going out in Minneapolis (and as someone generally just kind of crazy about increasing the fun I can have in every...
How to Write Something for the Tangential
1. Pick a zany topic that utilizes the niche interests of 20something Minneapolis ravewavers with internet presences (20sMRWWIPs). This includes things like Gchatting while at work, sleeping around, alcohol, indie bands, relevant blogs + bars, Four Loko, Adderall, and LCD Soundsystem/Radiohead. 2. Incorporate as many of these interests as possible into a ‘top x’ list, how to guide, where are they now, or ‘what your favorite x says about you,’ etc. format. 3. Include something innocuously offensive like ‘boobs,’ ‘sex,’ or ‘alternative lifestyles.’ 4. Mention...
Voices: A McGriddle – How I Learned to Embrace My Sensuous Sexuality
I didn’t ask to be the only breakfast sandwich with a delicious pocket of maple syrup, you know. I just wanted to blend in. Keep my head down. I thought I’d get a nice job, find a nice side dish and settle down in the suburbs. People call me a temptress. You think this is my fault? You think I asked to be so delicious? Oh let me guess I just went into the kitchen and willed myself into existence right? Did God give you...
