If Women’s Magazines’ Promises Were Edited by Lawyers

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30 Quick, Fresh Recipes. When prepared correctly and consumed with a low-calorie diet, supplemented by exercise, could promote weight loss!

Burn 300* calories the fun, new way. *Calorie burn varies depending on intensity of exercise completed combined with your weight and heart rate. Cosmo does not guarantee you will burn 300 calories.

7-Day Detox Plan! Consult a doctor before beginning this plan. (NOTE TO EDITOR: NEVER USE THE WORD ‘SHED’ IN RELATION TO ‘POUNDS’ IN ANY PROMISE.)

Best. Sex. Ever. Based on our subjective measurements, this advice could help support a positive sex life for you! Intense pleasure not guaranteed.

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21 focus-group-tested sex moves. One participant reported “mind-blowing” qualities!  Mind-blowing effect not guaranteed.

Cosmo’s most “Cosmo” birth control tips ever! Tip one: The best tips come from your gynecologist.

The quickie arm workout. (Image of cover model’s arms does not imply result of this workout.)

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Hot Body at a rate of approximately 2 pounds of weight loss per week! Women’s Health does not guarantee rapid weight lsos.

Promote belly fat reduction!

Your soul mate could be waiting online.

Support flaw* reduction in your facial skin! *Flaws include acne, wrinkles and dark spots.

The Sleep Trick. One tip that can lead to gradual success with regular practice!

-Becky Lang has to incorporate lawyer feedback into a lot of things